VOTE: Cheating or Not: Contact w/ opposite sex via mobile email, SMS text / chat on cell & hiding from spouse?

I say it is an affair of the heart, an emotional affair, and takes away from the marital relationship. It is NOT innocent fun, it is not a "game" or harmless entertainment, it is infidelity. To me, it's the SECRECY angle of this activity, as much as any suggestive talk, exchange of photos or even innocent discussion constitutes a betrayal of marriage vows.





If it is indeed so innocent, why guard it with secrecy?





It is the need for SECRECY that is pissing me off.





If it's such innocent dialog / conversations, WHY deny it is going on when it is SO OBVIOUS - and WHY the need for such SECRECY??





It is the DECEPTION of this activity that is the basis of the question...
VOTE: Cheating or Not: Contact w/ opposite sex via mobile email, SMS text / chat on cell %26amp; hiding from spouse?
Catch a cheating spouse
Reply:why the secrecy? that's probably because your spouse is either making fun of you or talking about how insufficient spouse you are.





i respect my wife's privacy.





it' doesn't mean that she's cheating or doing emotional affairs. we're so emotionally tied to each other, it's not necessary in my part.
Reply:Watch out dear! I have played this game with my husband and best friend! They just be flirting right now but one or both of them want something more. And if given the chance will act on it. If you can check the cell phone bill. Confront him on it and if that doesn't work give him a "or else". Just don't give up. I did and they ended up at her place making out--never went all the way but still.
Reply:He is cheating, what are going to do about it, keep arguing? I would forget the whole thing and just leave him if I were you, because if you are waiting for him to admit it, it may be awhile. Don't waste the money on the detective, unless it is his money.
Reply:Nope, not cheating...there is no sexual relationship going on





just insecurity on the part of the spouse or SO





However, there should be no need for secrecy from a spouse...if just a bf/gf..then they are only a bf/gf not a life partner.
Reply:cheating. the acid test for me is openess. if you are open and honest with your mate, it is okay. if you hide it from them, it is cheating. if it was truly innocent and harmless, he or she would have shared it with thier partner.
Reply:If an activity is done behind the spouse's back it is cheating. If it's hidden, there must be something to hide. It's cheating.
Reply:I say emotionally cheating. couples should be able to talk to each other about everything, s there should be no need to do so with anothe male or female unless it's your paster at church or something
Reply:Lying and decieving are always unhealthy in a relationship. Although they may not have had sex with the person, it could lead to that.
Reply:Most definitely an affair of the heart which could lead to an actual affair in the future.
Reply:If you feel that you have to hide something from your spouse, there is probably some element of cheating there.
Reply:Agreed.
Reply:Trust is trust - so yeah if it's a lie it's a lie.
Reply:I say cheating. It is not only physical.
Reply:if you feel the need to hide it then its probably cheating
Reply:simply put...if you need to keep it hidden from your spouse, then it's a violation.
Reply:I agree with you, people who have nothing to hide, hide nothing.
Reply:if you feel like you have to hide it it's a problem, cheating